Dreams

As I close my eyes and begin to sleep
I dream of you and it feel so deep
My dream travel back to the memory of past
Where you'll be the first, the one and the last
I miss the moment when you talk to me
When my heart beating faster seeing you smile at me
I hate the feel when you're not around
Cause I'm going weak and my world turn upside down
As I have lost you for the few years of past
Now God finally answer my prayer at last
HE sent you back to me to be my lover
For me to cherish you, forever and ever
I pray to God, please don't take you away from me
Only if the death that be our destiny
Thanks sayang for giving me a chance
And I swear to God that you're my only one

Hurts & Relief

I feel it hurts, i feel so scared
Without any words, I'm unprepared
The memory suddenly hunts me, in the middle of the night
The history had wounded me, when I'm turn off the light

I can feel the pain lingers, surrounded my fear
I suddenly hear the whispers, which haunt me for years
The tears broken, I'm out of air to breathe
The feeling was unspoken, it left me without peace

Unexpected visitor, has knocking the door
With an amazing character, i suddenly adore
I'm back to reality, by the kisses on my cheek
I'm back from the fantasy, that had gone and makes me weak

Amazingly i knew him, from the first moment i saw
Gratefully I'm in love with him, that he had made peace no war
I'm glad that he came, getting me out from this agony game
The love burning like eternal flame, that known for it's fame

5.28 AM

November 29, 2009

P/S: Inspired by New Moon

Just Another Beautiful Disaster

She’s just the sweet honey bee

That everyone thought her pretending to be

She’s just another beautiful disaster

That everyone keep taking advantage of her

She’s not another bitch that played everyone’s heart

But she just afraid of her heart to get touched

She’s not the girl who loves every man

She just the one who will vow for one until the end

Damai yang hilang

Bila mata tertutup, bibir terkedu
Bila air mata ini surut, bibir diam membisu
Kenapa perlu lagi air mata mengalir, sedangkan bahagia di depan mata
Kenapa perlu duka yang lahir, sedangkan kesetiaan jelas ternyata
Menguntai sebuah erti puisi, sambil mengalunkan sekalung melodi

Indahnya rahmat seribu erti, melutut merayu terduduk menanti

Damai yang hilang sudah lama dicari, diri terasa kosong
Kehidupan yang tenang sudah lama berlalu pergi, jalan terasa serong
Aku merintih pada kedamaian yang hilang
Pulanglah pada aku sekarang
Aku butuhkan kamu yang membuatku tenang

Kembali tenang seperti camar yang terbang

Jauh

Aku terasa jauh
Yang bikin hati aku kian luluh
Terasa aneh, terasa pelik
Aku hilang punca
Aku kian derita
Aku terasa sendirian
Walau aku punya ramai teman
Terasa seperti semangatku semakin pergi
Jauh berlari
Setiap detik yang mendatang, terasa berat untuk di tempuh
Setiap semangat yang hilang, semakin kuat membuatku rapuh
Setiap kenangan berlalu, tersirat seribu satu rahsia
Setiap kasih yang ku seru, berlalu seperti sebelumnya
Dan setiap kali aku menyembah pada yang maha Esa, terasa diri ini penuh cela
Setiap kali aku memohon dariNya, terasa seperti aku tak layak untuk mendapatnya

Tears on the summer midnight

The tears that fall, getting faster every second.
The fears that she feel, getting stronger being a burden.
The agony that she kept inside, once reveal during the summer night.
The dignity that keep her pride, once being break during the trouble she's fight.
As she doubt on her life, the voice inside kept her alive.
As she failed to succeed her strength, the love inside keep kiss away her pain.
As she feel the appreciation started to get weak, but she fail to avoid the heat.

As the anger turn to be sad, as the doubt of her turn to be bad.

Wish...

Dear Sayang,

I hate to see the melancholy on your face,
I wish that i could erase.
I wish that i could kiss away all the pain,
The pain that you have in those brain.
How i wish that i could give you those smile,
Even when i'm far away for a million miles.
How i wish that i could make you feel batter,
And that might bring us closer.
I pray to God to help you to be strong,
And avoid yourself from doing something wrong.
I wish that He could guide you.
For just being you.
I wish that He will bless you,
With a perfect honour soul that suite you.
I wish that you will quickly calm down,
From all the matters that makes you feel down.
How i wish for you to be here,
Being mine, now until forever.
How i wish that you know how much that i love you,
How i wish for you to know how far that this true.
How i wish...

P/S; Aku tulis poem ni waktu tengah emo dengan dia.

Stressed

Honestly, i'm so stressed right now. I feel like i wanna cry. Well i did cry, but only for a few second the i wipe it away cause i don't anyone else to see that i'm crying. I feel so down right now. Feels like i wanna go back home and sleep, and forget about all this things that seems like a nightmare to me. There's a lot of stuff that bothering my mind right now. I'm so stressed. Everything seems so complicated right now. With everything, studies, my emotion, my situation etc. Everybody may find me ok from how i act, but they never knew what i'm thinking inside.

During this semester, i have been ignore all the complicated stuff in my life, and i still can handle it one by one. But now, everything seems so messed up. I don't know what else to do. I'm tired of all this emotion pressure. Feels like my head wanna blow up. But when i think back, it probably because of this... Here is a poem that i wrote and might have to do with something in my life.

I've been ignoring you for some times

And i know it was a crime.

I've been making mistakes over and over again

Even while that, you never leave me in pain.

You give me everything that i request

And what i've giving back to you, was such a mess.

I know that i have beem appologise for a thousand times

But now i have to face the music for the punishment to my crimes.

I know that you still love me

Ever since i was born as a baby.

You light my way every night and day

You give me hope by teaching me to pray.

Once again i'm lost and far from your way

You punish me now and let me astray.

But i do understand the price to pay

For repeating the mistakes every single day.

Her

Silent rainy night

She holds her teddy tight

The melancholy of “Concerto de Aranjuez” reasoning in her ears

The loneliness of hope coming to her fears

She feel lost that could never imagine

She search for hope that no one have given

Only she, herself know what it was

Only both of them, shares, that the secrets she have to trust

The rest didn’t knows what inside her

That hiding behinds the lover

No one know what’s get through her

All the agony and painful that hurts her

The secrets she keeps inside

Still wasn’t falling to the right side

Melancholy and agony

Both of it like a symphony

Symphony that like a hurricane to her mind and soul

When she’s down and there’s no one to hold

Once again....

Once again I'm back at home
Once again I'm in my room
Once again i keep thinking
Of a melody that i can't wait to sing
Once again the trouble around me
When i don't want them to be
Once again i manage to ignore
Of a speculation that worse for more
Once again what hurt the most
When i try to hide but i got lost
Once again i begin to cry
For the beginning of the end that i wondering why...

10.42 PM

February 27, 2009

Inspiration...Inspirasi

I haven't sleep all night, it's all because drinking the damn caffeine. I can't sleep at all. Plus I'm going back to collage this morning, to send some of my clothes to hostel. But I'm going back alone. By train. I just read some post at Fynn Jamal blog, and I'm touched by all her words. And all her word inspired me to wrote something now.


I use to think, that love is everything
I use to cry and fall with all thus screaming
I use to think, that honesty will lead the way
But i forgot to think, about the destiny that lean to stay
For all this years i try to chase something
But i forgot, after all this years I'm still bleeding
I'm putting a big hope for too earlier
I'm stressing all the truth with a big desire
Desire that i wouldn't know how would it be
Desire that might change all my destiny
Naz was right
I'm still young, with all thus ego and pride
Still got a lot of things to learn
Without spoil it with thus curse and intuition
I'm so scared
Life was so unfair
Once again i forget
That life full of stories and thread

Dear Allah,
Please answer my prayer
Please tone down my desire
Please led me the way...
Before I'm broken down and stay...


P/S: Thanks to Fynn Jamal for this inspiration that i get after reading her post entitled "ajaran 2008". It's been quite a while i haven't wrote any poems...

Sacrifice

Do you remember all the things that you said to me?

Do you remember, from the trap that you set me free?
Will you ever be there when I'm falling down?
Would you help me stand up from lying on the ground?

Would you ever sacrifice?
From your lifestyle that so good and nice?
Would you ever sacrifice?
Until the day we dies

You're meant so much to me
Cause you're the one that set me free
From all the freaking agony
With all the lies that surrounding me

You're the one who willing to be with me
When i losing the grip, from my feet of the street
You're the one who treat me so freely
When I'm stuck on the heat, put your heart in a beat

You always be there for me no matter what happen
But I'm still wonder will you still ever be there with arms wide open
When you saw there was no hope will come
Will you still ever be around?

I still remember when I'm asking
"Will you ever be with me, til the end of time?"
And you answer without wondering
"Til the end of time,"

I know that you will, even it's killing you inside
I know that you will, even it's fighting for pride
Will you ever sacrifice, and always be there?
Will you ever sacrifice, giving your life and care?

12.55 AM

Inspired by a song "Sacrifice" by Nazire

Dedicated to Nazire. I love you so much.

She Use To Be There

She was always there waiting for him

But he wasn’t there, making her life in dim

He treat her unfair, because he didn’t care

She always be prepare, when he’s out of no where

She was always there, when he’s falling down

Reaching up his hand before he hit the ground

But he didn’t even realize all thus care that she give

Because he’s so selfish and thinking so negative

Her heart been hurt so much

Every time that he left without even touch

All the sanity has been gone so far

Without even realize that he torn her heart apart

She use to be his angle, that giving him hope and get him out of his pain

He caught, their love in a triangle, living her alone like she use to remain

He never realize until she’s gone, he’s suffer where no one to heal his wound

When she sing a song, now he realize that he’s been so wrong

Still feel she’s lingers around

Every time when he feel his world upside down

How he wishes she was there for to heal his wound

But now he hit the ground

2.28 Am
November 14, 2008

I wrote this poem and dedicate to anyone who just realize that he or she just lost someone that they love because he or she didn't realize how special that person is. A friend use to give me this quote:

"When you found love, treasure it, take care of it and make good use to it. Cause love come unseen, you can only see it when it's gone!"

P/S: Please correct me if my grammar was wrong. Honestly, my grammar is sucks!

Tercipta Untukku

Bila hati berbicara, rindu.
Bila mata berkata-kata, sayu.
Bila mulut terluah, rasa.
Bila hati menyatu, cinta.
Bila damai terasa, bersama.
Bila sayang terungkap rahsia.

-November 6, 2008, 11.35am-

Bila hati gelisah, keraguan tercipta.
Bila keyakinan kian rebah, tega menunggu duka.
Bila suara kedengaran, tangis meratapi.
Bila sayu kerinduan, air mata mengalir di pipi.

-November 6, 2008, 2.44pm-





A quote that i wrote before and after i know what happen to him. I miss him so much. And i'm so worried about him. Please Allah, take care of him for me. He had suffered enough. And i wish that i can get him out of his pain. Here was the song that reminds me to him. Tercipta untukku by Ungu. There had 2 version there. The other one is Ungu featuring Rossa. Same song but diffrent arrangement and have some adding for Rossa part.



Tercipta Untukku - Ungu



Tercipta Untukku - Ungu feat. Rossa (OST Ayat-ayat Cinta)

Narnia & me!

The Narnia movie just like what they told. The 1st movie was better then this one. I feel like something missing in this 2nd movie. I don't know what was it but i dont find it so interesting like the 1st one. Well to me, it just OK. To Narnian Fans, sorry to said that. Well about me, i wrote a poems about me & him & her & her & him. But here i only post one of it so they indentity about the other him won't be reveal. But i might reveal it soon. Just wait and see...

-Irony-

I hate you at the first side
It’s all because of ego and pride
I hate you for hitting on me
It’s all because I have other man beside me

But now it’s change
Even the hate still remain
But I fall in love in again
And it was so plain

You makes my world goes upside down
You made me totally drown
It’s all because of the charming touch
It’s enough to break one heart

I cry every day and night
It’s all because of one fight
I cry because you’re not only mine
But sharing with other two loves that totally blind

It feels so wrong
I hope that I’m still strong
It killing me inside
And burning me outside

I'm the only one who knows

Yesterday, i get out from house around 8am then got back at 11pm. So damn freakin tired. Well i'm going to some game show rehersal. I'm helping my Farhana (Budak Kecik) by being her back up. That game show call "Jangan lupa lirik" or in the American version they call "Don't Forget The Lyric". Well, when i got home, i got some inspiration to do some poem. But it's a malay poem. This poem ispired by a malay song call "Aku saja yang tahu" by Farhan Azizan. This poem called "Tak Percayakan Cinta". Reminds me to the one who break my heart and cause me to cry day by day.

Kerinduan, yang kurasa sejak kau pergi berlalu
Dimanakah, letaknya janji yang pernah kau lafaz dahulu?
Mengapa kasih, jadi begini?
Tega kau pergi, dan tinggal ku sendiri…

Bukannya aku tak pernah percayakan cinta
Tapi kerana hatiku terluka
Bukannya aku tak pernah memberi kesempatan
Sudah lelah aku menanti kesetiaan

Bukannya aku tak pernah merasakan cinta
Di hati terpahat setia, ketika kita masih bersama
Tapi dirimu, yang mengingkarinya
Tinggalkan aku, berlabuh di sana

Kerinduan, yang kurasa sejak kau pergi berlalu
Percintaan, antara kita yang pernah bersatu
Bukannya aku, tak percayakan cinta
Kerna terluka, kini ku merana

Ku undur diri, dari percintaan yang pernah tersemi
Tak ku mungkiri, segala janji terpatri dihati
Cintaku ini sudah pun pergi
Berlalu dengan sebuah elegi sepi….

1.51 AM
May 10, 2008